Showing posts with label Slashers. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Slashers. Show all posts

Monday, November 24, 2025

Census Bloodbath: 1986

If you're new to Census Bloodbath, click here.

So I may have taken a years-long hiatus in the middle of 1985, but from now I do intend to keep on moving forward at a semi-regular pace with Census Bloodbath, my project to watch and review every slasher movie from the 1980s. Of course, that will get more and more difficult as the decade careens straight into the video boom, allowing a higher number of lower quality movies to flood the market all at once, but in 1986, that hasn't 100% kicked in yet.

That doesn't mean we don't have a lot on our plate though. At my latest count, the year has a whopping 48 titles to get through! While 1985 had just two more slashers than 1984, we're now inflating that year's number by an additional 19 titles. So let's take a look at what lies ahead, shall we?

I've already reviewed all the big franchise titles and most of the major releases from 1986. So what's left? Some of these titles are Z-list classics that I'm excited to finally take a look at (Hunter's Blood, Spookies, Crawlspace), some I had literally never heard of before doing the research for this list (Escape from Coral Cove, Neon Maniacs, Las Vegas Serial Killer), and at least one is recognized as a good movie by actual real people who exist outside of the cult film space (Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer). I can't wait to find out which ones I love, which ones I hate, and which ones are so baffling I have no choice but to respect them!

Census Bloodbath: 1986
Movies in bold are films I had already reviewed at the time this was posted. Once I write each review, I will link to it from this page.

Doorman (January 2)
December Pookkal (January 14)
The Killer is Still Among Us/L'assassino è ancora tra noi (February 7)
The Hitcher (February 21)
Night of Fear/Nag van Vrees (February 28)
Revenge/Blood Cult 2 (March)
Khamosh (March 14)
Chopping Mall (March 21)
The Eleventh Commandment (March 25)
April Fool's Day (March 27)
The Zero Boys (March 27)
Torment (April)
Carnage (April 23)
You'll Die at Midnight/Midnight Killer/Morirai a mezzanotte (May 3)
Killer Party (May 9)
Crawlspace (May 21)
Escape from Coral Cove/Tou chuet sam woo hoi (May 21)
Whodunit? (May 22)
Truth or Dare?/A Critical Madness (June 1)
Knife Under the Throat/Le couteau sous la gorge (June 18)
Psycho III (July 2)
The Fantasist (August)
Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (August 1)
Aayiram Kannukal (August 15)
Psycho Girls (August 29)
Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer (September 24)
Mark of Cain (September 24)
Hunter's Blood (September 26)
Sorority House Massacre (October)
Deadly Friend (October 10)
Maligno (October 12)
Trick or Treat (October 24)
Bodycount/Camping del terrore (October 28)
The Female Scorpion/La Alacrana (October 30)
Neon Maniacs (November 14)
Slaughter High (November 14)
The Wind (November 17)
Dreamaniac (November 26)
Bestia Nocturna (December 6)
Into the Darkness (December 19)
Bloody Vacation/Vacaciones Sangrientas (unknown) 
Cards of Death (unknown)
Evil Laugh (unknown)
Hatchet/Balta (unknown)
Hour of Fear/A hora do Medo (unknown)
The House of the Blue Shadows (unknown)
Las Vegas Serial Killer (unknown)
Lucker the Necrophagus (unknown)
Night Ripper! (unknown)
Sapik/Sapık (unknown)
Satan’s Bed/Batas Impian Ranjang Setan (unknown)
Spine (unknown)
Yo te amo Catalina (unknown)

Word Count: 530

Friday, July 29, 2022

Census Bloodbath: 1985

If you're new to Census Bloodbath, click here.

Can you believe we're actually finally past the halfway point of this project? It hasn't been easy, believe you me. But now that we've officially exited the first Golden Age of the slasher film, we're entering a particularly interesting period. According to accepted slasher wisdom, A Nightmare on Elm Street was the project that kicked the slasher back into high gear, with a new boost of supernatural inspiration driving the storylines. 

This is true, but it takes a little longer than average to make an effects-heavy movie like that, even a cheap, shitty one. As such, those films wouldn't really start showing up until a bit later, so the period between 1985 and 1986 felt more like the genre was drawing a deep breath before really going full throttle in 1987,  speeding directly into a Silver Age spurred on by the increasing popularity of direct-to-video and shot-on-video offerings.

What we're left with in 1985 doesn't exactly inspire confidence. Yes, we've got Friday the 13th revving back up after its first alleged "final chapter" and Elm Street 2 already cementing the franchise's long reign of terror over the back half of the '80s. Other than that, however, it's a real grab bag of random holdouts that couldn't quite muster up the energy to make it to the market by 1984, when they were already past their sell-by date. 1985 saw 29 slashers in total, the exact same amount as the previous year. It's a slim year when compared to former years and upcoming years, but that's still so goddamn many. Let's take a gander at what's coming down the pike, shall we?

Census Bloodbath: 1985
Movies in bold are films I have already reviewed at the time this post was published. Once I write each review, I will link to it from this page.

Too Scared to Scream (January 4)
Caught in Fear/Atrapados en el miedo (March 15)
Friday the 13th Part V: A New Beginning (March 22)
Blood Cult (May)
Eternal Evil (May 1)
Bloodstream (June 6)
Cemetery of Terror/Cementerio del terror (July)
The Hills Have Eyes Part II (August)
Phenomena (August 2)
Formula for a Murder/7, Hyden Park: la casa maledetta (August 10)
Interface (September 11)
Pursuit of a Killer/Kong woo liu duen (September 20)
Appointment With Fear (October 25)
Blood Tracks (November)
The Ripper (November)
Terror at London Bridge (November 22)
The Nail Gun Massacre (December)
Bits and Pieces (unknown)
Blue Murder (unknown)
Cheekh (unknown)
The Dark Power (unknown)
Deadly Intruder (unknown)
Haveli (unknown)
Horror House on Highway Five (unknown)
Murderlust (unknown)
Night Caller/Ping an ye (unknown)
They Don't Cut the Grass Anymore (unknown)
Victims! (unknown)

Word Count: 480

Wednesday, April 20, 2022

Census Bloodbath: 1984

If you're new to Census Bloodbath, click here.

Well, well, well! Now that we're done covering the slasher films of 1983 and all of the ones we missed from 1980, 1981, and 1982, it's time to look forward into the bright glittering future that is 1984. 

1984 is the most Christlike of the slasher movie years because the genre had petered out and died by this point in the decade until one Mssr. Freddy Krueger swooped in toward the Fall and resurrected the entire enterprise with a wave of his clawed hand.

In fact, according to my research, not a single film was released in the first three months of the year, a dazzling stretch considering that there were only three months without a slasher over the entire first four years of the genre (April '80, December '81, and - weirdly - October '83). This year isn't particularly anemic, considering there are still 29 entries that came and went, but compared to the more fallow periods the slasher had and would have, that's downright paltry!

A reminder that, going forward, I'm still going to be focusing on less intensive capsule reviews for films, because that's all I have the strength and time for at the moment. But frankly, I'm still spitting out a startling word count, so I don't think you'll actually be suffering by me harnessing slightly more brevity.

Without any further ado, here is the calendar of all the gruesome glory you've got coming to you soon!

Census Bloodbath: 1984
Movies in bold are films I have already reviewed before posting this index. Once I write each review, I will link to it from this page.

Nooravathu Naal
(February 23)
Scream for Help (July)
Fear City (July 18)
Basag ang pula (July 20)
The Mutilator (October 5)
Silent Madness (October 26)
Day of the Reaper (October 31)
Screamplay (November 2)
Evil Judgment (November 9)
Silent Night, Deadly Night (November 9)
Karishmaa (November 30)
The Initiation (December)
Fatal Games (unknown)
Innocent Prey (unknown)
Rocktober Blood (unknown)
Satan's Blade (unknown)
Vultures (unknown)
Word Count: 423

Sunday, November 1, 2020

Census Bloodbath: 1983

If you're new to Census Bloodbath, click here.

So, it's November, huh? We've finally waded our way through the 1982 portion of the Census Bloodbath marathon! I promise to do my utmost to make sure that this next one doesn't also take four years. For your sake and mine! 

1983 is actually a pretty slim year for the slasher movie (on the scale of the 80's, of course, so there are still 32 of the damn things), as the first wave of the Golden Age starts to wind down. In fact, this is the only year of the 80's that doesn't feature an entry from either Michael, Jason, or Freddy (catch ya next year, buddy!). It was also skipped by Leatherface, though it at least saw the much delayed return of Norman Bates. 

But that franchise dry spell doesn't mean there won't be some excellent entries! Hopefully! Below, you can behold the list of what we'll be covering in the upcoming months, which will be updated with links as we go along.

Census Bloodbath: 1983
Movies in bold are films I have already reviewed before posting this list.

Double Exposure (January)
Sketch/Xue zhong xue (January 6)
The House on Sorority Row (January 21)
Blood Beat (February)
Olivia (March)
Curtains (March 4)
Deadly Lessons (March 7)
10 to Midnight (March 11)
The Prey (November 4)
Sleepaway Camp (November 18)
Scalps (December)
Angst (unknown)
The Antwerp Killer (unknown)
Blödaren (unknown)
Hanging Heart (unknown)
The Last Night (unknown)
Momentos de Prazer e Agonia (unknown)
A Night to Dismember (unknown)
Skullduggery (unknown)
Sledgehammer (unknown)

Word Count: 316

Wednesday, November 14, 2018

Census Bloodbath: Naked And Afraid

Year: 1987
Director: Katt Shea
Cast: Kay Lenz, Greg Evigan, Norman Fell 
Run Time: 1 hour 28 minutes
MPAA Rating: R

Our slasher project Census Bloodbath has taken a bit of a backseat recently, especially thanks to the insane number of marathons I was running in October. But what possible better fit could there be for diving right back into the heart of the 80's slasher movement than Stripped to Kill? Birthed from the churning sack of tricks at Roger Corman's studio, it's a nasty sleazy exploitation movie that makes zero effort to hide its own intentions. That beautiful poster says it all. 

But included in that "all" is the single most important element that makes Stripped to Kill interesting. It was directed and co-written by a woman. That's right, Katt Shea, the auteur behind Poison Ivy and The Rage: Carrie 2 got her start as a surprising number of women in the industry did, from the buckets of slime at Corman's place (as much as you might distrust Roger Corman's quality control, he sure gave a hell of a lot of people chances that wouldn't have gotten them otherwise).

Thanks?

In Stripped to Kill, you guessed it, a murderer be killin' strippers. Detective Cody Sheenan (Kay Lenz) must go undercover at the Rock Bottom strip club, to the wolfish delight of her partner, Heineman (Greg Evigan, of My Two Dads, who is the most 80's of hunks and never not dressed like Kiefer Sutherland in The Lost Boys). Between lengthy stripping numbers that rival the sheer mass of aerobics exercise stock footage in Killer Workout, they attempt to track down who exactly might be mowing down these poor working women.

It's certainly not their hair stylist, because there doesn't appear to be one within a ten mile radius.

As the story goes, Katt Shea was inspired to make this film after losing a bet with her husband (and co-writer) Andy Ruben, after which she was made to go to strip club. She was dreading it, but during the performance she had a revelation that for certain women, stripping was a completely valid form of artistic expression for certain women. She decided to make a movie that reflected that, and you know what? She certainly did. 

The plot of Stripped to Kill lurches randomly as you sit down every six minutes or so for a full striptease routine, a rhythm that was she was most likely contractually obligated to use by Corman & Co. The film still suffers as a narrative for this, but certainly not as much as it would if it had a male director. Shea presents some bold, exciting routines that catch the eye with more than just nudity, using costuming, sets, acrobatics, and avant-garde concepts in increasingly bizarre and captivating routines to show off just how versatile the act of stripping really is. It's a mini performance art project shoehorned into producer-mandated exploitation, and it's a sublime act of subversion.

Plus, Shea respecting these women as artists then extends to her respecting them as human beings, go figure. The characters are still pretty indistinguishable and not particularly fleshed out (look, there's only so much you can do in an 88 minute movie with 35 minutes of stripping), but their offstage dialogue and personality quirks are far from stereotypical. The film explores their motivations for stripping, their reactions to the way the men in the audience view them, and how they seek to support one another. It's like a season of GLOW, but with more nudity. One scene is - dare I say - even quite powerful. When the detective is dropped off by a coworker, Cody mentions that she's an incredible dancer, to which she replies "It's nice to hear that from a woman." She only hears compliments from men who want to manipulate her into sex, and hearing it from another woman is a validation of her art and worth. And I'm crying.

The character of Detective Cody is also extremely interesting. The more she learns about the world of Rock Bottom, the more she finds that there is truth and power in the act of stripping that she hasn't found anywhere else in her professional career. I wouldn't say this arc is completed because like most slashers the credits roll the millisecond the immediate conflict is resolved, but none of this would ever be found in a movie like this made by straight men, it just wouldn't happen. Especially in the 1980's.

Girl power!

All that said, I would still like to remind you that this is a crappy slasher movie. That's exactly the type of movie that I enjoy, so I personally wouldn't say it's a problem, but I don't want you to walk away thinking it's even Daytime Emmy material. The production quality is low, with murky cinematography married to muddy sound over a series of sets that - when they aren't in the club itself - always extravagantly fail to resemble the places they're supposed to be.

Take Detective Cody's apartment set. She walks in through some sort of atrium into a big empty concrete hangar with random tricycles and junk scattered around. Then she walks up an indoor metal staircase to the second floor, which has a couch and a kitchen setup, including a massive industrial oven just sitting on the counter. You know, an apartment!

It's a wonky movie, to be sure, from the chilling lack of extras in any club scene to the egregiously sinful original synthpop songs that blare from the soundtrack. Most of this adds a satisfying layer of camp, if you're into that (especially the third act Final Girl sequence, which involves about eighty unmotivated walls of flame bursting up in random alleys), but it's all a bit thin as an actual work of cinema. And there's no getting around the problematic killer reveal, which is [SPOILERS UNTIL THE END OF THIS PARAGRAPH] a bog-standard "crazed man in drag" play that makes absolutely no sense, though at least it gives us a chase sequence involving a beautiful Hawaiian twink with a killer smoky eye.

There is also some hilarity to be found in how much Kay Lenz commits to being a terrible dancer, as well as what is maybe the best disgruntled secretary character in the history of the motion picture. But Stripped to Kill is unfortunately exactly as thin a premise as the title promises. This certainly would have been bottom-of-the-barrel muck without Katt Shea, but given what it is, she can only raise it to the middle of the barrel. 

It's no masterpiece, then. But at least it's never a waste of time, and there's not a lot of this type of slasher I can say that about. 

Killer: [Eric (Pia Kamakahi)]
Final Girl: Detective Cody Sheenan (Kay Lenz)
Best Kill: None. The kills here are nasty and not particularly gory, they're certainly not the reason to watch, if there even is a strong one.
Sign of the Times: Literally everything Heineman ever wears, says, or does.


Or maybe the moment where a customer tries to tempt one of the strippers on a date with Dire Straits tickets.
Scariest Moment: Any time the women use the payphone in the hallway, they're approached by slobbering customers, so every scene involving a phone call highlights exactly how vulnerable they are.
Weirdest Moment: One of the strip acts involves a kabuki mask and arms reaching out from a giant spider web.
Champion Dialogue: "I did not spend a whole night talking about my penis. I am NOT obsessed."
Body Count: 6
  1. Angel is pushed off a bridge and lit on fire.
  2. Cinnamon is strung up with fishing wire. 
  3. Margolin is killed offscreen. 
  4. Spotlight Guy is shot.
  5. Stripper is shot.
  6. Eric is lit on fire. 
TL;DR: Stripped to Kill rises above its exploitation premise thanks to a female director who actually gives half a crap about the characters contained therein.
Rating: 6/10
Word Count: 1323
Reviews In This Series
Stripped to Kill (Shea, 1987)

Tuesday, November 1, 2016

Census Bloodbath: 1982

If you're new to Census Bloodbath, click here.


Phew! We made it out of the slasher gauntlet of 1981! While it's known as the Golden Year, the rather comprehensive scope of this project necessitated that I also visit the worst slasher entries imaginable, so that might be why it took me, oh, two years to finish that particular section... I gotta pick up the pace.

1982 isn't going to give me a chance to catch my breath, because although we've left the Golden Age behind, the slasher boom was still hitting America in full force, giving us a whopping 44 titles.

So what does 1982 have on offer for us? Take a look...

Census Bloodbath: 1982
Movies in bold are films I have already seen but will review again. Once I write each review, I will link to it from this page.

Madman (January 1)
Fantasies/The Studio Murders (January 18)
The Seduction (January 29)
Night Warning (February)
Devil Returns (February 17)
Pandemonium (April)
Basket Case (April 2)
Death Valley (May 7)
Visiting Hours (May 28)
The Forest (June 11)
Humongous (June 11)
Girls Nite Out (June 20)
Ghostkeeper (August)
Mongrel (August 23)
Superstition (August 26)
The Incubus (August 27)
Next of Kin (October)
The Slayer (October)
Blood Song (October 1)
Deadly Games (October 12)
Unhinged (October 15)
Hotline (October 16)
The Clairvoyant/The Killing Hour (October 24)
Tenebrae (October 28)
Trick or Treats (October 29)
Blood Link (November 10)
Alone in the Dark (November 12)
Wacko (November 12)
Time Walker (November 19)
Murder by Phone (December)
Don't Go To Sleep (December 10)
Cry for the Strangers (December 11)
Boardinghouse (December 31)
Midnight (December 31)
Dark Sanity (unknown)
Early Frost (unknown)
Word Count: 367

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Beat It, Essay: Few Times I've Been Around That Track

Here's the tricky thing: The essay prompt for my Russian Cinema class was to write a critical paper about a Russian film. Naturally I chose a slasher film. What do I look like, a nerd? 

The subject of my reviewings is 2007's Putevoy obkhodchik aka Trackman. So far so good. The only thing is, this critical piece will be a little more formal and academic than my normal style, so I'm going to attach a truncated review at the end of this essay to cover my normal topics like how cool that gore shot was or how the movie needed more hot dudes.

The Prompt
Write a critique on a Russian film not viewed in class, relating it to Russian films that you've seen as well as your personal film background.

The slasher film is an American tradition, dating all the way back to the 60’s and 70’s with the likes of Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho and Tobe Hooper’s The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. By the Golden Age of the genre in the 1980’s, audiences couldn’t get enough of the low budget shockers, sending their box office returns through the roof. Naturally, when Russian filmmakers turned from their introspective, usually war-related fare (like Ballad of a Soldier or Prisoner of the Mountains) to attempts at American-style Blockbuster filmmaking (like the superhero action flick Black Lightning), the slasher genre was one of the first to be imitated. Igor Shavlak’s 2007 effort Putevoy Obkhodchik (aka Trackman) is a fairly devoted recreation of the formula, with some distinctly Russian twists.

Unfortunately Trackman is not quite as good as other Russian action/thriller efforts or the classic films of the slasher’s heyday, but it is an interesting piece to study in terms of how Russian filmmaking collides with a traditionally American genre format. The basic structure of the plot comes from the 1981 Canadian slasher My Bloody Valentine, which depicts a pickaxe-wielding killer in a miner’s uniform and gas mask stalking his victims through the underground corridors of a mine shaft. This idea is almost exactly recreated for Trackman, with minor changes. 

Instead of a crop of teenagers being stalked, it’s a group of untrustworthy bank robbers and their hostages hiding out in an underground tunnel system and plotting to steal the money from one another, mirroring the social and criminal decadence of 90’s films like Brother and The Thief. Instead of the killer being an enraged miner who narrowly survived a cave-in caused by negligence, he is a presumably mutated product of government cover-ups following the Chernobyl disaster. This character trait not only ties itself in with Russian history, it taps into the folklore surrounding the incident. 


As evidenced by the opening credits, which depict childlike drawings of the Trackman’s violent tendencies, Trackman is an almost mythical figure that taps deep into the subconscious of modern Russian society. In this way, he is implied to be a figure akin to that of Freddy Krueger, the grotesque villain from A Nightmare on Elm Street, whose legend has permeated the mythology of his suburban town to such a degree that the local children have written a jump rope rhyme about him.

This folklore element is crucial to many successful slasher films, including The Burning (in which a horribly burned groundskeeper named Cropsy – based on a New York state legend - stalks a local summer camp), Black Christmas (which utilizes the urban legend about a killer calling from inside the house to chilling effect), and Night of the Demon (which uses the famous North American cryptid Bigfoot as its mythical killer), so by utilizing the trope and reimagining it under a Russian context, Trackman lays a good foundation for itself. By combining the lingering effects of Chernobyl with the typical genre framework, Shavlak managed to create a classic slasher atmosphere with a distinctly Russian flavor. Unfortunately the green director doesn’t find much else to do with his excellent framework, resigning himself to a subpar thriller effort and turning his mythical killer into a hackneyed plot device instead of a being of true, potent evil.


One of the biggest, most egregious flaws of Trackman is its unsteady pacing. Any scene featuring the Trackman himself crackles with tension, but the film mishandles his infrequent scenes, arbitrarily teleporting him around the underground tunnels in an attempt to shock the audience through his sudden disappearances whenever a character whom he is stalking turns to look at him. Unfortunately this has the effect of deflating any tension the film has managed to muster, because any time Trackman threatens to do something interesting, he is whisked away by the unseemly whims of the narrative. 

This style could have been more effective had the killer’s mythical background been explored more thoroughly, but most of the important details regarding his motivations, personality, and even appearance are left to conjecture. The sharp-eyed slasher veteran can piece together the Trackman’s modus operandi (presumably he is so hideously deformed beneath his mask that he kills anybody who looks at him out of shame and fear), but these ideas are never thoroughly explored. 

Most of the film’s other elements of quality suffer from a similar lack of directorial guidance. For example, Trackman has terrific production values (despite not being a co-production like Burnt by the Sun or Mother and Son), but the slick, professional-looking tunnel sets are overlit and beset by a dully limited color palette that leaches out the film’s capacity to scare. Likewise, the budget runs short at the special effects, which look more like stagebound theatrical creations than truly cinematic ones. They don’t completely draw the spectator away from the film’s reality, but it does make some of the more intense scenes difficult to swallow. Together, these lackluster forces combine to create a tensionless horror film, devoid of any real terror.


Similarly, the occasionally great cinematography (which almost always manages to frame the killer in an eerily menacing manner, especially in one sequence where he is glimpsed through the whirling blades of an industrial fan) is marred by an indecent reliance on slow motion. Slow motion sequences are randomly scattered about the film, rarely if ever enhancing a scare. Rather, they pad the run time by forcing the viewer to contemplate one of the hostages walking or smoking a cigarette with almost absurdly lethargic speed. These moments have no motivation within or without the film, and are utterly tiresome. 

In addition, there are an abundance of sequences where the handheld camerawork becomes hyperbolically shaky, almost as if the director of photography intentionally swung the camera back and forth in some sort of apoplectic rage. The film is slightly redeemed by a finale so strange that it slips into the realm of surrealism, but these flaws in the film’s overall production value are difficult to overlook, to say the least.

However, despite its numerous shortcomings, Trackman may just be a growing pain for Russian genre filmmaking, considering that the country’s film industry has never had a booming horror scene. The keener interest in horror films has only developed over the past couple decades, presumably following as a direct result of the fall of the Soviet Union. Not only was the Russian population experiencing a breathtakingly new regime with more lax production codes, it was also beset with the criminal decadence that marked the post-Soviet period of the 90’s. The general populace was terrified of the long-term effects of this social negligence and sought catharsis in the cinema. 


Criminal horror films like 1994’s Mute Witness (which depicts a snuff film crew murdering their victims onscreen and evading the police while pursuing the sole witness), 1990’s City Zero (in which a factory worker discovers a town gone mad following the fall of the Soviet Union – including a secretary who works naked and a series of lunatics who worship the stranger as a rock ‘n roll legend), and 1998’s Of Freaks and Men (which depicts the downfall of Russian society following the rise of capitalism in the form of one pornographer breaking two families apart) used the rampant sex, violence, and rock ‘n roll of the era to shock viewers out of their complacency and provide them with safe, vicarious thrills.

Now that the decadent period has ended, Russian horror filmmakers are Hollywoodizing the horror genre one step at a time with films like the found footage effort Devil’s Pass and the torture film Captivity (both co-productions with the UK and America, respectively), as well as Trackman. Coming as it does at the beginning of the second wave of Russian horror cinema, it is understandable that the film has such a wealth of flaws – nothing like it has ever been attempted on Russian soil before. 

The biggest triumph of Trackman is in laying a foundation for future efforts in Russian horror. If budding filmmakers pick up where Trackman left off (with a folkloric antihero that taps deep into the Russian subconscious) but polish the edges and deepen the character’s mythology, the slasher genre could one day see something truly great come out of the untapped film terrain of Russia.

Trackman (Путевой обходчик / Putevoy obkhodchik)

Year: 2007
Director: Igor Shavlak
Cast: Svetlana Metkina, Dmitriy Orlov, Aleksandr Vysokovskiy
Run Time: 1 hour 20 minutes

OK, I'm gonna give it to you straight because you veteran Popcorn Culture readers are made of sterner stuff than my film professors: Trackman kinda sucks. It's real bad, you guys. The worst part about it though is that it squanders some great potential. Along with the intellectual claptrap you may or may not have read above, the killer has the audacity to use a gun.

The ground rule of slasher filmmaking is to never give your killer a gun. Sure, they're allowed in the grand finale of a slasher film so we can see some cool exploding heads, but the audience showed up for some baroque gore effects, not a goddamn Martin Scorsese movie. Anyway... 

The killer does have an interesting backstory, but literally all of it is conjecture. The only thing Trackman deigns to do with its title character is have him rip out people's eyes, sneak up behind people with a pickaxe, disappear when they turn around, and skulk around random tunnels until he's needed again for a cheap scare. There are Teleporting Killer moments so egregious that I genuinely thought he had mutant powers due to the Chernobyl radiation. He spends the bulk of his time trudging back and forth in empty tunnels, trying to maintain his balance despite the camera's hyperbolically canted angles.

There's one genuinely great scare/gore moment (a POV of the Trackman using a device to steal the ringleader Kostya's eyes - incidentally, Kostya looks a little like Fred Armisen's evil twin so that's fun) and a couple creepy sequences of the Trackman standing in the dark tunnels in front of a flickering light, but the bulk of the film is anemic to the core. The "gouged-out eye" makeup that you can see in the essay above looks less like an eye socket than a chalk eyepatch, and there's not much else of note in the special effects department. That is the showstopper. It's hardly worthy of a suburban haunted house, let alone a feature film.

The finale is pure action nonsense that involves exploding gas canisters and hot-wiring a motorcycle, but at least it's semi-intersting. The rest of the film is content to slap some slow motion on its characters every 12 seconds or so as if the true villain were a student arthouse film that gained sentience and stalked the filmmakers in the editing room.

It's clumsy and it's dull, and it was sheer torture to pull four and a half pages on the topic out of my brain. But I did it and here it is. Marvel at the glory.

Body Count: 5
  1. Splint has his eyes gouged out.
  2. Kostya is pickaxed to death.
  3. Olga is shot to death.
  4. Sergeant Irkut is run over by a slow-moving trolley.
  5. Kirk is shot to death. 
TL;DR: Trackman is a dull, amateur slasher that squanders its generic potential.
Rating: 3/10
Word Count: 2008

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Fleisch Ist Fleisch

Year: 2000
Director: Stefan Ruzowitzky
Cast: Franka Potente, Benno Fürmann, Anna Loos
Run Time: 1 hour 43 minutes
MPAA Rating: R

Once the slasher film left the 80's, it went to a very strange place. It died twice during the decade itself (once in 1983 and once in 1989) then lay dormant, rattling around in Direct to Video Hell until Scream dragged it kicking and screaming from its shallow grave in 1996. Thus was the beginning of the age of postmodern meta humor, take it or leave it. By the turn of the century, it was pretty uncool to be a straightforward slasher film.

In America, that is.

While I would hesitate to call the 2000 German flick Anatomy (aka Anatomie) a pure slasher film, it certainly approaches its material (a hybrid that bridges the gap between slasher and torture porn with a little bit of cult thriller thrown in for taste) with a sense of gravity that the Hollywood slashers had lost in the tide. 

Not that "gravity" means "no exploitation." This is the slasher genre we're talking about.

Pretty understandably, Anatomy is all about the human body: Young college student Paula Henning (Franka Potente of the terrific Run Lola Run) is the top med student in her class. When she is sent to a  special summer program at a prestigious Heidelberg university, she is ready to buckle down and study harder than she ever has. The only problem is, her classmates are less concerned with the bodies on the slabs than they are with each other's.

Her roommate Gretchen (Anna Loos) is a bit of a woman about town, juggling hunky but sensitive RA Hein (Benno Fürmann) and the surprisingly buff nerd Phil (Holger Speckhahn), and her classmate Caspar (Sebastian Blomberg) won't rest until he can rub his weird soul patch all over her. To make her distraction even worse, she discovers that the university may be run by an ancient secret society known as the anti-Hippocrates: a sect which illegally experiments on still-living humans and turns them into plasticine exhibits with a fast-acting preserving agent called Promidal.

You'll never look at the Bodies exhibit the same way again.

Anatomy is, on the surface, one of the most average horror flicks ever conceived. Its pretty, twenty-something cast is dispatched in gruesome ways but the gore is kept offscreen as much as possible, there's a sumptuous smorgasbord of fake scares, and a series of third act reversals spin the film 180 degrees so many times that it gets dizzy and collapses, the killer is still alive, quip, quip, and roll credits. But if you grab your scalpel and forceps and peel back the surface layer, there's some really interesting structures hiding underneath. Let's get to dissecting!

Adrenal System: The film is full of shallow, airbrushed scare sequences, but plenty of the rest is mighty chilling. The film's use of the fictional drug Promidal is perhaps its most effective invention, because it allows for a series of scenes where people fight their own stiffening bodies to try and find a way to survive. Also, the props in the body exhibit are exquisitely manufactured pieces of gorgeous grue, and a library scene in the third act uses the claustrophobic shelves to nail the audience to their seats, redeeming itself for its somewhat anticlimactic act 2 break, which mightily deflates the tension in order to allow Paula to take a train ride and find out a secret about her grandfather, who used to work at the university. Needless to say, it's no big surprise and we could have found that out in a 30 second montage instead of a five minute sequence.

But I digress. There is certainly enough material in Anatomy that works at a gut level to keep it lively and entertaining throughout.

Skeleton: The unequivocal best (and most consistent) elements of the entire film are the production design and the cinematography. The anatomy hall is given an imposing grandeur with slick, faceless metal walls that threaten to engulf everything within them, working with the camera to create immensely clean, precise, flowing images that are almost scientifically perfect.

Just like Hein's bone structure.

Heart: The Germans aren't exactly known for their humorous stylings, but the comic heart of Anatomy is top notch. The interactions between the students provide a warmhearted comic relief, with several preternaturally well balanced one-liners, my favorite of which is, "Do me a favor and let me know the next time you take your clothes off." That one is going straight into my repertoire.

Sex Organs: What the Germans are known for, however, is their unconventional sexuality, which Anatomy delivers in spades. I'll have to check with the film historians on this one, but I'm pretty sure this is the first time any two characters have hooked up on an autopsy table that was just used to dissect a ruptured spleen. I swear, nothing turns on Gretchen and her cronies more than the prospect of some illicit bangers and mash next to a couple dozen goggle-eyed corpses.

On top of its unerringly interesting approach to sex, Anatomy is also remarkably feminist. The Slut character turns out to be the top in her class, the women are fully in control of their sex lives (although the sniveling, hypersensitive men can't exactly handle it), and the film shows nary a single wanton breast, instead focusing on getting its male characters in and out of their shirts as often as possible. In this way it reminded me quite positively of Girls Nite Out, the single best purveyor of man meat in all of slasherdom.

My absolute favorite scene in the film is when a girl finally sleeps with her long-awaited suitor... to pass the time before a meeting.

Go women!

This is the part where I thank Sergio for buying me Anatomy and its sequel to fill out his Amazon cart. (And get him off my back for not mentioning him a lot recently. I guess anonymity isn't as important as I thought. Hi Sergio!)

Brain: Although the third act reveals never entirely makes sense, Anatomy does have a keen brain hiding in its skull cavity. The throbbing undercurrent of the film is of generational discord. Paula wants to be a doctor to prove herself to her famous physician grandfather, ignoring her father's warnings about becoming too concerned with professional success. As she discovers the dark secrets behind the university and the city of Heidelberg, she realizes that the ancient atrocities committed in the town have never truly died away.

As Paula attempts to uncover the past and save lives in the present, she learns that there's no escaping history. The entire film is plagued by the sins of a past generation, mirroring the country itself, which will never be able to shake off the ghost of the Third Reich. It's really rather poetic and it adds a thoughtful, deeper meaning to what otherwise could have been an entirely boilerplate affair.

Grey's Anatomy with more stabbing, if you will.

At the end of the day, nobody is going to be busting out their Anatomy disc at parties or anything, but the film is a decent millennium slasher thrill, and worth checking out for medium-strength fans of the genre.

Champion Dialogue: "Don't worry, those red spots are only pubic lice. You'll be fine!"
Body Count: 7
  1. Patient #1 has his flesh flayed.
  2. David is stabbed with a scalpel.
  3. Phil is stabbed to death.
  4. Gretchen is injected with Promidal and flayed.
  5. Grombek's throat is slit. 
  6. Caspar's Roommate is injected with Promidal.
  7. Hein is electrocuted and stabbed in the heart.
TL:DR: Anatomy is a generic modern slasher thriller, but it has enough heart and soul to make it a thoroughly interesting watch.
Rating: 6/10
Word Count: 1293