Blumhouse Is Dead, Long Live Blumhouse!

Hey everybody!

As you probably know, I have spent the first seven months of 2017 writing for the horror blog over at Blumhouse.com, a job which I was very dedicated to (which is why you only got one or two reviews a week on this end, at best). Unfortunately, due to corporate decrees made far above my station, the web site was shut down back in summer and has now officially been dissolved.

The takeaway is twofold:

1) I need a job, so hit me up.

2) I have salvaged all my old Blumhouse content, which is now posted on my blog and backdated so it doesn't swamp anybody's RSS feed. Be warned: they're in no particular order and the formatting will be a little wonky, because I had to bail them out of a sinking web site with no time to spare. But here it all is! Please feel free to check out any ones you might have missed!

10 Rules for Surviving a Horror Film Not Mentioned in SCREAM
Horror's Most Effective (And Underused) Weapon: The Fire Extinguisher
5 Non-Horror Directors That Need to Direct a Horror Film
5 Popular Horror Films You Might Not Realize Were Directed by Women
Gizmo was an Alien? Five Bizarre Revelations from Horror Movie Novelizations
The Top 10 Dean Koontz Novels
Five Slasher Villains You Can Take Home to Mom
A Definitive Ranking of NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3's Dream Warriors
The Strange and Infamous History of Britain's Holloway Sanitarium
Five Unlikely Couples Found in Horror Fan Fiction
The REAL LIFE Story of Four Portland Students Locked in a Haunted House
10 Obscure Slasher Films You Need to See
10 Lesser-Known Adolescent Horror Books
10 Great Horror Posters from the 2010's
5 Movies So Extreme They Sent Viewers to the Emergency Room
Five Hilarious Horror Movie Blooper Reels
Why SEED OF CHUCKY is the Radically Queer Film We All Need Right Now
5 of the Goriest Kills in Non-Horror Movies
An Interview With Chris Alexander And HELLRAISER II’s Barbie Wilde On BLUE EYES!
A Readthrough of the SIXTH SENSE Children’s Book Series
Was Thomas Edison a Murderer? The Mysterious Disappearance of a Film Pioneer
Five Non-Horror Directors Who DID Make a Horror Movie
6 Great Road Trip Horror Movies
Ten ’80s Slasher Posters That Are Better Than the Actual Movies
Enter the White Void with Poppy, YouTube’s Most Ethereal and Disturbing Personality
Five Horror Movie Diseases You Wouldn’t Want to Catch
Seven Great Songs That Were Ruined by Horror Movies
Five Minor Injuries That Are Actually the Grossest Moments In Gory Movies
Ten Obscure Horror Flicks Streaming Right Now on Amazon Prime
Interview with DAWN OF THE DEAD’s Ken Foree About his New Film THE MIDNIGHT MAN!
How Wes Craven’s Porno Predicted His Entire Filmography
Meet the Newest Big Horror Icons: The Minions
Wes Craven's Top 10 Nightmare Scenes
Nine Lesser-Known Horror Titles Currently Streaming on Hulu
The Haunted Save Mart of Chowchilla, California
Ten Horror Franchises You've Probably Never Heard Of
Eight Movies with Horribly Misleading Titles (And What to Watch Instead)
Five Obscure Horror Titles on the National Film Registry
Happy Fourth Of July! Here Are The Six Best Flag-Based Horror Movie Deaths
8 Essential Books About Horror Movies
6 Genre Movies Produced by the Last Person You’d Expect
Enjoying THE HANDMAID’S TALE? Check Out These 9 Other Allegorical Horror Titles!
Listen to These Nine Horror Podcasts Made by Fans of SHOCK WAVES!
Eight Truly Terrifying Modern Movie Masks
Harry Potter Was in TROLL? Exploring Weird Horror Movie Name Doppelgängers
Five Slasher Movies That Roger Ebert Actually Liked
The Political Timeliness of SEOUL STATION — Animated Prequel to TRAIN TO BUSAN

Word Count: 611

Blumhouse: All Work And No Play

Here's what I've been up to over at Blumhouse.com over the past week or so, including my very first interview!

Five Non-Horror Directors Who DID Make a Horror Movie

This article is a follow-up to my piece about which directors should give in and direct horror, which I assume no reader actually remembers I wrote, but I was still interested in exploring the topic anyway.

Was Thomas Edison a Murderer? The Mysterious Disappearance of a Film Pioneer

I actually learned something in film history! Here I expand on a story only ever mentioned in a paragraph or two of film textbooks, but is secretly the most interesting thing in any of them.

A Readthrough of the SIXTH SENSE Children’s Book Series

Yes, this is a real thing. I discovered these books at a used bookstore a while back, and they've inspired at least two articles at this point.

An Interview With Chris Alexander And HELLRAISER II’s Barbie Wilde On BLUE EYES!

I'll let you in on a little backstage secret. I actually didn't talk to these two at the same time, but I worked very hard to make it look like a conversation. I think I did a good job!

5 of the Goriest Kills in Non-Horror Movies

I really do love to explore how horror creeps into other genres. Plus, the stuff we made kids watch back in the day is mega messed up.

Word Count: 235

Blumhouse: Spring Cleaning

Please enjoy another roundup of my newest articles at Blumhouse.com!

Why SEED OF CHUCKY is the Radically Queer Film We All Need Right Now

I was very proud of this article, in defense of a frequently misunderstood sequel that I find to be pretty brilliant, but it arrived to a resounding chorus of absolutely nobody caring. Oh well.

Five Hilarious Horror Movie Blooper Reels

This is a topic I've secretly loved for a long, long time but I've never thought to write about. I wonder what else this job will wring out of the deep, dark parts of my brain cavity.

5 Movies So Extreme They Sent Viewers to the Emergency Room 

Sure, people can be wimps, but some of these films are gross as hell. The thing I find most interesting about horror is that it's one of the few genres that can actually affect an audience physically, something that defines powerful art.

Art is Not Dead: 10 Great Horror Posters from the 2010's

I really dug into the It Follows poster in this article and I hit a rich vein of analysis I didn't know I had in me. Also, here's a runner up poster for good measure.

Like GOOSEBUMPS? Try 10 Lesser-Known Adolescent Horror Books

During the writing of this article, I discovered a wellspring of horror knowledge that revealed I've been into the genre for a whole lot longer than I originally thought.
Word Count: 237

Blumhouse: Ghosts And Knives

Here is another collection of articles I've penned for Blumhouse over the past week!

10 Obscure Slasher Films You Need to See

Longtime followers of Census Bloodbath may notice that the bulk of these films come from 1980 and 1981, the two years I've fully completed for this project. You would be right. The good news is, I'll have plenty of fodder for another list as I continue down the line.

The REAL LIFE Story of Four Portland Students Locked in a Haunted House

Ghost stories do really well on the site, and I don't have any of my own. So I borrowed a friend's and it did gangbusters.

Five Unlikely Couples Found in Horror Fan Fiction

I'm so sorry about this one.

The Strange and Infamous History of Britain's Holloway Sanitarium

This is a subject I've been interested in for a long time, and I've finally found an outlet in which I could organize all the various bits of information I've accumulated over the years!

A Definitive Ranking of NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 3's Dream Warriors

The most important thing that I, or any horror writer, will ever produce.
Word Count: 190

Blumhouse: Last Week Today

While I crank out some long-gestating reviews, let's take a moment and revisit some of the articles I've had posted on Blumhouse.com this week! It's all happening so fast.

Five Slasher Villains You Can Take Home to Mom

I was kind of coerced into putting Norman Bates on the list, so here's one more entry for your reading pleasure:

Roman Bridger (Scream 3)

He might look like a big ol' nerd in this film, but I've always had a bit of a thing for Scott Foley. And his character in Scream 3 is a successful young Hollywood director. He'd be a real hit at your next dinner party, hands down. As long as you don't mind those hands having blood on them.

The Top 10 Dean Koontz Novels

My whole life has been leading up to this article. I've always been a voracious reader, and I'm loathe to tell most horror fans this but I genuinely prefer Koontz to King almost every time. Here's an extra book to check out:

Intensity (1997)

This is the one I was chastised by my dad for not including. The popular French extremist flick High Tension was essentially based off this novel, so much so that Koontz successfully sued them for copying his work. It's a chilling, pulse-pounding thriller that's probably #11 in my top 10, if that helps.

Gizmo Was an Alien? Five Bizarre Revelations from Horror Movie Novelizations

Yeah, I don't have a bonus entry for this particular list. That would require a lot more research than I'm ready for right now. But this was definitely one of my favorite articles to write!

5 Popular Horror Films You Might Not Realize Were Directed by Women

Go Women in Horror Month! We've been celebrating this all February at Scream 101, but that's not enough to contain my love and support. Here's one more film that I didn't include on the list because our audience is exclusively horror fans who would have laughed at me for including such an obvious pick:

The Slumber Party Massacre

Although this cheapo slasher is as exploitative as they come, there's a stirring of actual subtext hidden in the killer's phallic drill weapon, a leftover from feminist writer Rita Mae Brown's satirical original script. This flick was directed by Amy Holden Jones, and both of its sequels were also directed by women. It's an awesome opportunity, and I'm happy to report that all three are some of the best of their kind.
Word Count: 413

Blumhouse: Come To The Dark Side

Check out my new article for Blumhouse.com!

5 Non-Horror Directors that Need to Make a Horror Movie

I have a very special bonus for you this time around. Here's a sixth entry from the list that I cut before publication! Your reward for being a dedicated Popcorn Culture reader is a look at this oh so controversial pick.

#6 Ryan Murphy

Known For: Glee, American Horror Story, The People vs. O.J. Simpson

The prolific showrunner has shown a definite proclivity for horror, having created both American Horror Story and Scream Queens, and before that awkwardly shoehorning a serial killer subplot into his plastic surgery soap opera Nip/Tuck. But his only film projects have been Eat, Pray, Love and The Normal Heart. I'd like to see him apply his deranged visual imagination to a horror film, and having it be a single, 90-minute long story might reign in his notorious lack of an attention span.
Word Count: 155

Blumhouse: What I Did Over Summer Vacation

Howdy, folks! It's been slim picking around here lately because I've been so busy, and one of the blot projects I'm working on is a little more long-term than my usual fare. So I've decided to keep the content rolling by sharing what I've been working on over at Blumhouse.com, along with some insider secrets for those who have been following Popcorn Culture all this time.

Here are the two articles I've published so far, with many more to come!

10 Rules for Surviving a Horror Film Not Mentioned in SCREAM

Longtime readers might recognize this one as a list I posted a couple years ago, but I'm constantly rethinking this topic as I watch new movies, so my debut article is a fully remastered take.

Horror's Most Effective (And Underused) Weapon: The Fire Extinguisher

Now this one is an idea that I haven't written about before, but it was without a doubt birthed from my love of The Blob, a well-documented phenomenon around these here parts. I'll take any excuse to talk about The Blob, and if it's on a global web forum, so be it.

I can't wait to share more articles I've been working on! See you soon!
Word Count: 201

Moving Right Along...

Howdy, folks! It's time for some quick Brennan news! Today is my first day at a new job I'm very excited about, interning at Blumhouse.com. Blumhouse Productions has been responsible for a lot of the horror content of the last few years, including the Paranormal Activity and Insidious films, and their web site is a repository of all sorts of horror discussion.

I'm really eager to get started, but this also means that I'll be transitioning out of writing news for Arrow in the Head over the next few weeks. That doesn't mean I'll be gone completely, but I'm still defining where I'll be with them. I'm just letting you guys know everything that's going on! I think this shift will have a negligible impact on how frequently I update Popcorn Culture, but the next couple weeks might get a little on-and-off as I find my feet. Plus, I'm officiating a wedding this week, so that's a wee bit distracting.

Thank you everyone for bearing with me! Here's a quick list for your enjoyment. Although Blumhouse is a household name in horror, they have their fingers in all sorts of pies...

5 Films You Probably Didn't Know Were Made by Blumhouse

#5 The Normal Heart (2014)

I did compare The Normal Heart to a body horror film thanks to its terrifying depiction of disease, but Ryan Murphy's AIDS drama is definitely a surprise from the Blumhouse team. It was also my #6 film of 2014!

#4 The Jinx (2015)

Another project that's tangentially horror, Blumhouse was behind the groundbreaking documentary about wealthy murderer Robert Durst that eventually got him arrested.

#3 Whiplash (2014)

Damien Chazelle's debut film Whiplash was a Blumhouse Production, so you have them to thank for the glory that is La La Land.

#2 Jem and the Holograms (2015)

Maybe they don't want to be reminded they made Jem and the Holograms, but glittery girl pop musicals are the farthest genre I could imagine them exploring, and boy am I glad they did.

#1 Tooth Fairy (2010)

That's right, before Blumhouse found their horror niche, they threw a lot of spaghetti at the wall, and one of those noodles was this vehicle for The Rock in which he turns into the Tooth Fairy for some reason. Who knew?

Word Count: 379

BH: Like GOOSEBUMPS? Try 10 Lesser-Known Adolescent Horror Books

Yet another article rescued from the gaping hole that was once Blumhouse.com

As a lifelong fan of the macabre who didn’t get into horror movies until high school, I spent a lot of time exploring the darker side of culture in literary form. As such, I’ve happened across a lot of horror books meant for young readers that stray a little further from the beaten path than titles like GOOSEBUMPS or SCARY STORIES TO TELL IN THE DARK. If you have kids or are just interested in how creepy kids’ storytelling can get, here are ten lesser-known titles that kept my skin crawling when I was younger.

Note: I used a rather loose definition of “horror” for this list, generally including stories with light tones that have darker themes or horror tropes. Also, the final three or four entries start to drift across the line from “kids’ literature” to “young adult literature,” but are sufficiently cloudy that I saw fit to include them.

THE GREAT GHOST RESCUE (1975) by Eva Ibbotson

This British children’s novel has it all: a young and pleasant ghost who doesn’t fit in with his terrifying family, a schoolboy who learns to love them all, and a wicked nobleman with a plot to exorcise the spirits. It’s a soaring adventure that is safe for young kids, but isn’t afraid to indulge in classic imagery like screaming skulls and bloodstained banshees.

THE BAILEY SCHOOL KIDS series (1990 – 2006) by Marcia T. Jones and Debbie Dadey

These books are just pure fun. With titles like VAMPIRES DON’T WEAR POLKA DOTS and MUMMIES DON’T COACH SOFTBALL, this series (which comprises over 50 books) details the adventures of Bailey School students who begin to suspect that the authority figures in their life might not be who they seem to be. Not everybook is horror-related (see SANTA CLAUS DOESN’T MOP FLOORS), but a comfortable two-thirds are, and they’re a good way to teach kids about valuable tropes when it comes to famous monsters from film and mythology.

THE MONSTER’S RING (1982) by Bruce Coville

“Twist it once, you’re horned and haired. Twist it twice and fangs are bared. Twist it thrice? No one has dared.” So warns THE MONSTER’S RING, about a young boy who acquires a magic transforming ring at a local shop. The book plays like a cross between R. L. Stine’s THE HAUNTED MASK and 976-EVIL, all taking place in the maniacally fun, eerie world crafted by Bruce Coville.

THE CHOCOLATE TOUCH (1952) by Patrick Skene Catling

I remember this story being more lighthearted than anything, but the charming tale of a boy who transforms everything he touches into chocolate starts off as a jubilant retelling of the King Midas myth until it descends into bigger and scarier consequences. Eventually, his desire for sweets threatens everything that he loves, and you start to feel a bit of a pit in your stomach.

THE SIXTH SENSE: SECRETS FROM BEYOND series (2000-2001) by David Benjamin

I’m actually working on a full article explaining this very trilogy in greater detail, so I’ll keep this short. But yes, this is a series of chapter books in which Haley Joel Osment’s Cole Sear solves mysteries about ghosts. It covers common kids’ book themes like the challenges of making friends and living with a single parent, only interspersed with graphically detailed descriptions of charred flesh, plane crashes, and long-dead authors weeping over their unread books in the public library. It’s completely bonkers and grotesque, which is why this series is definitely worth digging up.

THE MYSTERIOUS MATTER OF I. M. FINE (2001) by Diane Stanley

Here’s where things get really meta. This is a kids’ horror book aboutkids’ horror books, obviously very closely based on R. L. Stine’s GOOSEBUMPS series. A young girl notices that a popular horror series is causing local children to react strangely. It starts with a sudden boom in the popularity of gummy worms, but as each new book arrives, the reactions become more and more sinister, even life-threatening. She teams up with a male classmate to track down the author and stop the vicious cycle. If you only check out one entry on this list, make sure it’s this one. I. M. FINE is a creepy-crawly romp that turns childhood fears of the material they’re reading into a reality.

THINGS NOT SEEN (2002) by Andrew Clements

As close as kids’ novels have ever gotten to Kafka-esque body horror, THINGS NOT SEEN is the story of a young man who goes to sleep on a cold, stormy night and wakes up invisible. At first he enjoys playing tricks on his friends and family, but as the reality of his new life sets in, things take a dark, philosophical turn. If the Invisible Man had a son, he’d love this book.

The REMNANTS series (2001-2003) by K.A. Applegate

The follow-up series to Applegate’s immensely popular ANIMORPHS books, REMNANTS follows a group of people awakened from cryosleep on a colony starship only to discover that the ship has malfunctioned, killing the majority of the people onboard. It’s very much a sci-fi story, like a younger take on PASSENGERS, but I still remember its grim, grisly depictions of death. It’s definitely a twisted, detailed account of darkness and violence in the near future that left my young self shuddering.

THE SUPERNATURALIST (2004) by Eoin Colfer

This dystopian novel is another sci-fi inflected piece, following the exploits of a team of teens in a futuristic society who do battle with supernatural, life force-draining entities that they can see only after suffering a near-death experience. It’s a rollicking action tale first and foremost, but it’s chock full of deeply unsettling imagery and a heaping helping of pain and misery.

The GONE series (2008-2013) by Michael Grant

OK, the six-part GONE series is for sure a teen series, as it deals with more complex issues including eating disorders and sexuality, but a great many of its protagonists are kids. In GONE, the seaside town of Perdido Beach is trapped within a dome-shaped force field (this was a year before UNDER THE DOME, mind you) and everyone over the age of 15 has vanished. The kids must try to rebuild society while supernatural forces threaten their lives. Described as “LORD OF THE FLIES meets Stephen King,” GONE challenges teen stereotypes with a no-holds-barred tale of murder, lies, and mutant superpowers. It might sound a little silly, but it’s a heart-pounding, violent, mysterious story that will grip you from page 1.

BH: The Top 10 Dean Koontz Novels

Yet another article rescued from the gaping hole that was once Blumhouse.com

When it comes to household names in literary horror, the list pretty much begins and ends with Stephen King. This is a shame for so many reasons, but one of the biggest is that it gives short shrift to Dean Koontz, a King contemporary who is just as dizzyingly prolific. Since he began his career in 1968, Koontz has authored over 100 novels and novellas, some under an array of pseudonyms.

For anyone interested in exploring horror books, Koontz is an excellent stepping-stone away from King, but it’s hard to know where to start, especially because none of his works have such easily identifiable titles as THE SHINING or CARRIE. Well, I’m here to help. Please, step into my office. You can use this list of Koontz’s top 10 novels as a guidepost for your journey. Grab your reading glasses and a warm blanket, because these titles are sure to send a chill down your spine!

ODD THOMAS (2003)

The most current novel on this list, ODD THOMAS is, appropriately, an odd one, but one of Koontz’s best blends of comedy and horror. The tale of a kooky young man who sees dead people has since been adapted into a film starring none other than Anton Yelchin.

WHISPERS (1980)

So here we go, straight from the newest book to one of the oldest in the lineup. Although he’s been writing since the 60’s, Koontz didn’t come into his own as a true blue novelist until the mid-70’s, so WHISPERS hadn’t yet been sanded of its splinters. It’s a shabby, brutal little shocker about a woman being attacked by a killer she thought was already dead, that feels like a grindhouse flick transposed onto the page. Fun fact: Alfred Hitchcock wanted to develop WHISPERS into a film, but passed away before it could happen. It eventually got a not-so high-profile adaptation starring Chris Sarandon in 1990.

DRAGON TEARS (1993)

Now, this is a weird one. It combines Koontz’s love of soppy sentimentalism (there’s nothing he adores more than writing about couples finding love amidst tragedy and golden retrievers, something that certainly separates him from Stephen King) with the existential chaos of the mid-’90s. This paranormal tale of two cops told they only have 16 hours to live plays like a bonkers ’80s horror movie where literally anything can happen.

THE BAD PLACE (1990)

Every time Frank Pollard goes to sleep, he wakes up covered in evidence of mysterious nighttime travels he can’t remember. THE BAD PLACE starts off as an eerie mystery and descends into a series of grotesque twists and turns that will keep your eyes glued to the page. This one also almost got a film adaptation, from DREAM WARRIORS and THE BLOB’s Chuck Russell. The rather complex spiritual nature of the book prevented it from becoming a viable screenplay, something that would dog Koontz throughout his career.

MIDNIGHT (1989)

Four different stories begin one night in Moonlight Cove, as the town is besieged with a rash of gruesome, possibly supernatural killings. MIDNIGHT is another spooky mystery, about small town citizens being used as pawns in a wicked game of life and death. Koontz has really hit his stride by this point, spinning tales with terrifying, ruthless circumstances yet still instilling in the reader an unshakeable sense of hope.

WATCHERS (1987)

Probably Koontz’s most high-profile novel (it was adapted into a four-part, almost entirely unrelated film franchise that featured weirdly memorable stars like Corey Haim, Wings Hauser, Mark Hamill, and Lisa Wilcox), WATCHERS features a clash between two genetically enhanced dogs that is much more captivating and visceral than you’d think. It’s an electric thrill ride through the dusty underbrush of Southern California.

FALSE MEMORY (1999)

This is probably the Koontz book I’ve read the most, and for good reason. All of the themes he’s developed over the years reach full throttle in FALSE MEMORY, in which a strong central couple fight back against a seemingly invisible, all-powerful villain. Also it takes place in Southern California and there’s a dog. It’s the little things, you know? This time, the battleground is the characters’ own minds. When Martie Rhodes is suddenly stricken with autophobia (an extreme fear of her own capacity to cause harm), she must claw through her clouded, adrenaline-soaked judgment to save her husband and her friends from a menace she’s not even sure exists. It’s a terrifying story about grappling with personal demons that will strike fear into the heart of any reader who has one.

NIGHT CHILLS (1976)

And here we reach the oldest novel on the list, perhaps the first where Koontz found the distinct writerly voice he’s been using for decades now. The small New England town of Black Water (you know it’s an early work because it doesn’t take place on the West Coast) has been pierced by subliminal messaging that makes the population putty in the hands of an evil conspiracy. This is Koontz’s most powerful treatise against the wicked potential of bureaucracy and the idle upper class.

LIGHTNING (1988)

LIGHTNING is everything you could want in a thriller novel. A high-stakes mystery that actually gets even better when sci-fi elements are introduced, LIGHTNING is also a love story populated with the most well-etched, sympathetic characters that Koontz has ever written. It’s a dazzling adventure through the events of one unlucky woman’s life as it unfolds under the protection of a shadowy guardian angel, as she’s on her way to becoming a Sarah Conner-esque badass. It hardly gets better than this.

PHANTOMS (1983)

Now, don’t laugh. You’ve probably seen the 1998 film adaptation of this novel, which is not so great (though Ben Affleck is the bomb). But the film stripped every shred of nuance from the source material, which explores the fraught relationship between two sisters as they arrive at a secluded mountain town where the entire population has vanished. Koontz has always been skilled at blending genres, but PHANTOMS glides through locked room mystery, paranormal siege thriller, theological treatise, speculative historical fiction, and sci-fi action romp without skipping a beat. Koontz has the keenest ability to conjure a fully fleshed character from thin air in just a single chapter, then strip that flesh from their very bones before your eyes. It’s fearless, it’s bonkers, and it’s almost inhumanly violent. If that’s not a solid recommendation, I don’t know what is.