Showing posts with label Ben Johnson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ben Johnson. Show all posts

Friday, November 25, 2016

Popcorn Kernels: Chokes And Daggers

A set of mini-reviews from movie explored in month 3 of the Scream 101 podcast, all 70’s proto-slashers.

The Town That Dreaded Sundown (For the Scream 101 episode about this film, click here.)


Year: 1976
Director: Charles B. Pierce
Cast: Ben Johnson, Andrew Prine, Dawn Wells 
Run Time: 1 hour 30 minutes
MPAA Rating: R

A hooded maniac known as the Phantom Killer murders couples in various lovers’ lanes of Texarkana while a Texas Ranger and an assortment of kooky cops attempt to track him down.

I was excited to check out The Town That Dreaded Sundown, if only because it was name-dropped in Scream. I should learn to have stricter criteria for my movie-watching, because this inept slasher tested my endurance even more than the previous week’s late 70’s trash fire When a Stranger Calls. Although, I will give it one thing: Much like Golden Era slasher A Day of Judgment, The Town That Dreaded Sundown’s best quality is that it’s a weirdly convincing period piece, this time set in the post-World War II 1940’s.

Other than that, TTTDS (the weirdest acronym I’ve ever had to type) is a plain-jane riff on The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. A killer strikes in a rural Southern town, accompanied by foreboding narration that gravely insists this was all based on a true story (although John Larroquette’s gravelly Chain Saw intro easily outpaces Vern Stierman’s jaunty monologue, which carries through the entire film and makes the whole affair sound like a documentary you’d screen in a second grade classroom). There’s also a severe hesitance toward showing any onscreen gore.

However, where Tobe Hooper’s kinetic, gritty direction gave Chain Saw a brutal tang in spite of its chaste gore, The Town That Dreaded Sundown got Charles B. Pierce, an inept at best amateur who was more keen to capture B-roll of his beloved town that actually tell a satisfying story. In his hands, the tone flies wildly out of control, tilting into slapstick comedy both unintentionally (the Phantom Killer tiptoes and pratfalls his way through his own murder scenes like he just stepped out of a Pink Panther movie) and with deadly seriousness.

You see, The Town That Dreaded Sundown has the yuk-yukkiest goofy cops this side of The Last House on the Left. I’m talking characters that would be shunned in the cop movie cafeteria by folks from Police Academy or Keystone Cops. Their staggering ineptitude weighs heavily on this movie, especially the drag-dressing, car-key-forgetting, crash-car-into-the-swamping Sparkplug, played with tooth-gnashing, Barney-Fife-ish glee by Pierce himself.

These characters, who we’re forced to spend the entire movie with, tear the atmosphere to shreds. The killer’s vague positive qualities (i.e. the creepy way his mask moves with every breath he takes, at one point he murders a girl with a trombone, etc.) are hardly strong enough to pull this wacky, boring slasher experiment back from the brink.

Rating: 3/10

Alice, Sweet Alice (For the Scream 101 episode about this film, click here.)

Year: 1976
Director: Alfred Sole
Cast: Linda Miller, Mildred Clinton, Paula E. Sheppard
Run Time: 1 hour 38 minutes
MPAA Rating: R

After her sister is brutally murdered at her first communion, Alice is blamed for it and the killings that follow.

Alice, Sweet Alice is definitely an oddity. Not quite a drama, not quite a horror film, and not quite a slasher, it’s sort of a primordial ooze of mood and sleaze that made it essential viewing for this month. It’s basically a 100-minute riff on Catholic iconography and ideology, twisting holy imagery into something devilish and unclean. Considering I’m about as far from Catholic as it’s possible to be without being actively Satanic, this didn’t really do much for me. But I nevertheless respect its gusto.

Alice, Sweet Alice’s focus on image and mood is unfortunate, considering that its director isn’t especially talented, but there are some prop designs that just plain work. The mask worn by the killer is a particular triumph, an opaque plastic, face-obliterating monstrosity with garish make-up that maps perfectly onto the eyes to create a chilling expressiveness despite its blank features. There’s also a three-headed doll that’s straight-up nightmare fuel, though it’s easy enough to make a doll creepy.

And the plot itself isn’t all bad. The reveal of the killer only ever feels arbitrary (especially considering that the plot unspools for a good 20 minutes or so after that no-so-pivotal moment), and the movie doesn’t provide enough red herrings to make it a truly satisfying mystery (we’re meant to believe Alice is the killer, but it’s so transparently desperate to convince us of this that it’s obvious she’s not). But many early sequences feel like an Italian melodrama, reveling in tear-stained close-ups of women on the brink, and you won’t catch me complaining about over-the-top drama. Hell, I was a fan of Empire.

That’s really about it for Alice, Sweet Alice. The gore is slight, although their retractable knife provides some stunning shots, and there’s plenty of Tobe Hooper-esque sleaze filling in the gaps of the story. I’m looking at you, Mr. Alphonso, the cat-owning perverted landlord who is by far the most interesting character in the entire movie. Alice, Sweet Alice isn’t the best proto-slasher, but it was enough to renew my faith in the form after the ignominious one-two punch of When a Stranger Calls and The Town That Dreaded Sundown.

Rating: 6/10

Tourist Trap (For the Scream 101 episode about this film, click here.)

Year: 1979
Director: David Schmoeller
Cast: Chuck Connors, Jocelyn Jones, Jon Van Ness
Run Time: 1 hour 30 minutes
MPAA Rating: PG

Five young vacationers get a flat tire and find themselves trapped in a creepy roadside museum stocked with evil mannequins and a telekinetic killer.

Have you ever wondered what would happen if the kids from The Texas Chain Saw Massacre made a pit stop at the Psycho motel, only instead of Norman Bates behind the counter, it was some sort of twisted Pinocchio man? If you aren’t at least a little curious, then maybe Tourist Trap isn’t for you.

However, I’m a devotee of weird cinema, and if there’s one thing that Tourist Trap has in spades, it’s weirdness. It’s not so much a functional narrative, but its deranged nightmare logic is captivating. The use of mannequins as a source of terror is a logical step forward from the classic trope of creepy dolls (one that would likewise be put to good use in the next year’s Maniac), but Tourist Trap does more than just a lazily effective gimmick. These mannequins are a buck wild special effects spectacle that more than makes up for the 70’s-esque lack of gore in the kill scenes.

Tourist Trap throws all logic out the window in favor of pure, off-kilter energy, having its mannequins twist their heads to reveal gaping mouths, motionlessly vocalize in a screaming chorus, and occasionally spring to life for a spot of soup and crackers. It’s unpredictable, it’s incomprehensible, and a truly pure experience unlike any other, all underscored by the unadulterated lunacy of Pino Donaggio’s score, which seems to have been written for a children’s cartoon and is spliced in here at the most inopportune moments.

If you’re not into films that have the singular purpose of knocking you on your butt with pure strangeness, then don’t seek out Tourist Trap, because it doesn’t have much else to offer. The characters are thinner than Donald Trump’s skin, the Final Girl is kind of an asshole, and the killer has an incredible mask but ruins it by flapping his gums a bit too much. There’s a slight feint toward the political potency of Texas Chain Saw with a dropped line about the highway driving away business, but despite having plenty of time to do so in the interminable third act, it never goes anywhere.

But that mannequin material really is some great stuff. And Tourist Trap knows it, hauling them out as often as the meager budget can allow. Which is quite a lot. Turns out mannequins ain’t expensive. Where it’s not a great movie, it’s a delightfully twisted experience, and I’m glad I took the time to sit through it.

Rating: 7/10
Word Count: 1366

Friday, January 3, 2014

Census Bloodbath: Climb Aboard The Murder Train

For the crossover review of this film over at Kinemalogue, click here.
For our podcast episode about this film, click here.

Year: 1980
Director: Roger Spottiswoode
Cast: Jamie Lee Curtis, Derek MacKinnon, Ben Johnson
Run Time: 1 hour 37 minutes
MPAA Rating: R

You didn't think I would kick off 2014 with just one 1980 slasher set on New Year's Eve, did you? (Seriously, what is it with these things?) Terror Train, an early slasher that came out a solid two months before New Year's Evil, is everything that film is not. Namely - Canadian.

It has been a long-standing belief held by the horror community at large that Canadian slashers are just magically better than their American counterparts. Happy Birthday to Me, Prom Night, Visiting Hours, Black Christmas, My Bloody Valentine... All Canadian, all viewed as classics of the form by one group or another.

Terror Train has mostly been forgotten by all but a select few, but for those who make the journey, it is a true delight. Starring Jamie Lee Curtis in her second Canadian slasher of the year (the first being Paul Lynch's Prom Night), her presence alone is enough to boost this flick to the upper tier.

And though her presence is a great gift, Terror Train is good enough that it could have almost survived without her. But as it is, she is here - a great anchor to a pretty terrific slasher.

The film is worth it for the opening titles alone.

It's New Year's Eve and the brothers of Sigma Phi have planned the prank of the year - at their bonfire, resident virgin and Mick Jagger lookalike Kenny (Derek MacKinnon) is going to be lured into a room by the prospect of getting it on with Alana Maxwell (Jamie Lee Curtis). Although she is reluctant, she goes along with it and Kenny is tricked into kissing the corpse of a dead woman one of the med students lifted from the morgue.

He should have known that nobody in a slasher movie gets to have sex with Jamie Lee. She's the Final Girl, for crying out loud. This is sacred business.

Whaddya know but things went terribly wrong and Kenny was committed to the local hospital.

Cut to three years later as the frat sets off on yet another New Year's Eve party, this time a masquerade (dun dun dun) on a train. I hope they know where the train is going cuz I sure as hell don't. We Meet the Meat in a whirling jumble of shouting and as such, have no idea what anybody's name is until about the time that they die. But I, your ever dutiful scribe, have compiled a comprehensive list here.

There's Mitchy (Sandee Currie, also of Curtains and no other film outside of the 80's), Alana's best friend who's sore about her graduating early but supportive of her success; Doc (Hart Bochner), Mitchy's douchey prankster boyfriend and the man behind the scheme that destroyed Kenny; Mo (Timothy Webber), Doc's best friend and Alana's boyfriend who convinced her to come under false pretenses despite her immense hatred of Doc and the frat boys. Their endless combinations and interactions fuel the first third of the plot and are surprisingly compelling as a narrative, not just filler between the death scenes.

Also on board are Pet (Joy Boushel of the Labor Day-themed Canadian production Humongous), a skanky blonde whose terrible costume is just giant pants pulled all the way up to her shoulders; Jackson (Anthony Sherwood), the token black fellow; the Conductor (Ben Johnson) who likes to cockblock with card tricks; and Ken the Magician (the David Copperfield), the hired entertainment. Oh and Ed (Howard Busgang), the merry prankster who never actually makes it on board due to that pesky saber in his gut, the poor bastard.

At least he got to wear this cool mask before he kicked it.

And off we go! The first half hour or so is a whirl of college partying, parlor magic tricks (at the hands of at least three characters), and that old slasher standby - impressions. Was this an 80's thing that I don't understand or did every slasher writer have recurring nightmares about Saturday Night Live?

It's fairly demure and bloodless, so for a while the whole thing seems like a bust. I mean, come on, raising a knife and cutting away might have worked in the 60's, but you gotta keep up with the times, man!

However, once Mitchy dies (spoilers? no.), the gloves come off. It doesn't get more gory, but Terror Train pulls out all the stops and becomes a secretly pretty great murder mystery thriller. The setup is brilliant - having the movie on the train means it's chock full of cramped, sinewy, and ill-lit corridors. Not to mention isolation is built into the scenario.

It's a terminally cheesy slasher, but once the tension kicks in a sense of overwhelming dread inhabits the film. In fact, it's one of the only slasher films to be genuinely scary - to any degree - without resorting to cheap jump frights.

Nope. Nothing wrong here.

And the twist. The twist. I would be a loathsome heathen if I were to reveal it here (nope, not even in white text - mum's the word), but it's a brilliant little thing. At once absolutely obvious and completely mind-boggling. It's exactly what you expected but from such a totally confounding direction that it leaves you completely blindsided.

Not to talk it up. I don't want anyone to go in with expectations. Maybe it sucks. Maybe it doesn't exist. Who knows?

Phew. Got outta that one.

Terror Train has a lot going for it. The killer displays a sense of humor rarely seen in the usual crew of silent murder machines and Jamie Lee Curtis always has wattage as a star. She commands the camera from the very first second she's onscreen - buried in the middle of a crowd shot.

This film is a great one-off that I'm glad stands alone, one solid glittering structure among the teetering and mouldering franchises. Although I would pay good money to see Terror Train IV: The Little Engine That Could... KILL.

This time, he's really steamed!

Killer: Kenny Hampson (Derek MacKinnon)
Final Girl: Alana Maxwell (Jamie Lee Curtis)
Best Kill: You know those boxes magicians use when they pretend to stab swords into people? Well this time it's not pretend.
Sign of the Times: No 2013 teenager would be so pumped to ride a train, believe you me.
Scariest Moment: Alana is trapped in a caged area while the killer stabs through the grate with an iron pole.
Weirdest Moment: The conductor dances in the train office while a woman in a wheelchair rolls from side to side.
Champion Dialogue: "I never saw anybody so dead as that."
Body Count: 11; including the killer.
  1. Ed is impaled by a saber and pushed under a train.
  2. Jackson's head is slammed into a mirror.
  3. Mitchy is strangled offscreen.
  4. Mo is stabbed during a blackout.
  5. Walter the Engineer suffers a head wound.
  6. Shovels the Locomotive Fireman dies offscreen. 
  7. Doc is decapitated offscreen.
  8. Donnly gets a sword in the stomach.
  9. Ken the Magician is impaled inside his own box of swords.
  10. Charley is killed offscreen.
  11. Kenny is hit with a shovel and knocked into the icy river. 
TL;DR: Terror Train doesn't have much in the way of gore, but what it does have is a taut thriller with Jamie Lee Curtis, so what does blood matter?
Rating: 8/10
Word Count: 1232